Five Dead In Mind Blowing Explosion

by Shaky Parkinson

Five Men have died and another is, "Very poorly," after a bout with some homemade liquor at an industrial estate in Boston, Lincolnshire.  It is unclear why the party were partying, but the general opinion is that they were celebrating a successful job well done.

Unfortunately the party got out of hand at 7PM last night and rapidly deteriorated into what the Forensic Team are describing as, "One hell of an evening.  Wish I'd been there."

Police are saddened by the loss with Chief Constable Bobbins saying, "No one should die partying.  Forgetting the night before is something you enjoy while living.  We will never forget this brave band of fun enthusiasts and their memory will live on until it is forgotten or possibly remembered."

Anti-liquor group, TWATS (Total Willing Attitude Towards Sobriety) quickly seized upon the tragedy claiming an accident like this was always possible.  "It was always possible," puffed Lyn Schmob, head of the organisation, "This one off, extremely rare and probably highly inaccurate case is just one in a short list of horrific accidents that can occur with the brewing of illegal toxins."

The Families of the dead partygoer's are saddened by the loss but are hoping to get a fresh batch on before the memorial service that will be held throughout the week at 'The Dog and Lion'.  "We wanted to do a candlelit vigil but the TWATS thought it too dangerous," gulped one Widow.

The people of Boston are sending their thoughts out to the families of the deceased and, "Will be there around 5ish for service." One resident, Danny Puffin philosophised, "You won't see the likes of them again."

A full investigation is underway to compile a timeline of last night's events, find any surviving images for Facebook uploading and discern exactly what barley was being used to give the brew such an intriguing texture.