Inebriated News Guff Editor Cannot operate Keyboard

by Shaky Parkinson (That's me bitches)

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Journalist and all round arse Shaky P has expectantly delved the depths of online depravity to d o something.  Bad intro wait.  After a night out with the star (Banter, this, baby( renowned fool Shaky Parkinson has managed to successfully get himself home to write this article.

After an all attack with the sniffer dogs and the mongs at the nobgoblin in which the EDitor in Cheif suffered numerous blows to his sobreity and expectations of humanity he was let loose on the public to sigh and mourn their loss as a species.

When asked for a comment I had this to say, "When the wind blows and the moon tides, let peace be your symbol and this staement be your fool. "

Asked to elaborate I was forced to come up with, "The darkness reigned, in the forest deep where the wolves cry of sadness and th e thoughts of the groove can be marred with bad intention and why the fuck am I listneing to the Gloomy Galleon theme from Donkey Kong 64.  Eerie stuff.  ON THIS DAY BEHOLD.  FOR BEHOLDING IS PROBABLY A WORTHWHILE BUSINESS AND SUCH.  The caps lock was intentional."

Archive image, camera was buried
underdeath tv so make do

It seems the perveyor of wit has come up trumps and forgotten any such witty dialogue as his once active imagination was able to prcess.  He is now left with tiredness, shame and confusion, although a spellcheck free article is a blessing in disguise.  The fake glasses and moustache aren't fooling anybody.

"I'm sure this coul've been better," shrieked Shakiy from within his own subdued concious, "This joke is good but the execution is pants," he typed, "Stop fucking things up hands, make with the funny and all that."

It is thought that although crtical (my god this spelling might cost me the whole joke (and yes I've had to change a fair bit))SHaky will rapidly recover after a bit of nap and some good thiking, although it is this reporters opinion that upon rereading this mound of shite the lack of coherent thought and correct spelling will cause him much aggrivation.  Let's hope this joke is readable.