New Sitcom A Complete Failure

by Shaky Parkinson

Go Team!!!

New sitcom "Banter with the Newbies", has plummeted to the bottom of the ratings after a sterling seven minute broadcast.  It appears the forced humour and appalling lead character have finally brought about a realisation that Britain is no longer the world's comedy forerunner.

The comedy was the brainchild of iPod Accessory Salesman Mike Gleeson, who was thrilled at the reception, "All in all I think things went well.  My style is certainly an acquired taste and seven minutes beats any personal goals.  Fingers crossed for a second episode."

Critics have been raving wildly about the show with the Daily Mail saying, "This is the worst thing that has ever happened."  The Sun were a bit kinder and ran with, "Complete shit."

The Radio Times have been at the forefront for a campaign into getting the show banned from television screens.  "Only a tosser would watch it," they write, "Let's hope Gleeson can play video games better than he can write comedy."

This debacle has led to much needed questioning about the BBC's current comedy output.  "You've got to hit rock bottom before you realise you have a problem," claimed Mark Thompson, "Now we know things have to change we've instantly commissioned a further ten series of Little Britain and are planning a spin-off show of My Family centring around Baby Kenso.  Poor Gleeson, he means well but he just hasn't quite got it right.  I spoke to him over a game of Fifa and although he found the situation hard to grasp I think he'll pull through."