"It was tragic," sobbed Mrs. Ketchup, "I got up this morning and it was freezing and it wasn't until I opened the fridge, I saw that the entire contents had gone off overnight. None of the appliances were working and when I looked out of the window I saw the new turbine lying embedded in the mud."
It is thought the incident occurred somewhere between ten minutes past one and eleven minutes past one with a fifteen second difference given for magnetic alteration and a sighting of the event by local drunk Hamish McHamish puts the incident at eleven clock tomorrow night.
"It was windy," attempted McHamish, "Very windy, well more a moderate breeze. There was this big ball of light. I was taking in the air and it just went. Went. Gone, poof bye. Tragic."
"That's modern engineering for you," sighed Mr. Ketchup, "Utter tat. Two week's I've had that and look at it now, rubbish. You wouldn't get this with a coal burner, even they're back in fashion now. I just do not understand the modern world. Truth be told I was against the whole thing, bloody wind has never done me any good so why would it start now? I say fuck the planet, it obviously don't want our help. Pass me that insurance form."
Panic has quickly spread to neighboring towns and in the last seventy-two hours wind turbine shares have fallen steadily and are absolutely worthless to anyone. "We couldn't let this happen to us could we Carl," puffed Carl's wife, Mrs. Carl, "Once one has gone down then it is best to panic and turn the gas back on, I'm not taking any risks."
Today's events have left a community shocked and stunned and shocked again and it may take decades for the Ketchup's to recover from the loss of such a large sum of money.
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